the strangers in my bed: Archive

May 19th

3,712 notes

May 19th

29,139 notes

May 19th

214 notes

i cybered on omegle today

You: hi
Stranger: hey
You: wanna cyber
Stranger: Depends are you a girl? ;)
You: ya
Stranger: And okay then, you start?
You: i come into ur bedroom
You: and ur sleeping
You: and i crawl under your blanket
Stranger: I'm still asleep
You: u feel me pulling down ur pants
You: and u wake up and smile
Stranger: I kiss you gently, still sleepy
You: then i smile and open the scissors around your dick and snap them closed
You: cutting off your penis
Stranger: wait
You: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR CHEATING ON ME
Stranger: Then what...?
You: I HATE YOU
Stranger: I didn't cheat
You: you bleed to death in your bed
Stranger: i didn't cheat on you. lets restart ok
You: nobody ever knows what happened
You: i flee to mexico with your Mercedes
You: the end
Stranger: I have a mercedes?
You: not anymore faggot
 Your conversation partner has disconnected.

May 19th

103,085 notes

potatoandotherwise: I am not being cuddled or made out with so someone is obviously not doing their job

May 19th

189 notes

May 19th

19,867 notes

3 tags

Last night was retarded. But he was really sweet it turns out, never asked for his number and he walked us to our room and swiped us into the building since we couldn’t swipe ourselves in. Just wow. good guy alert. Though we did grind during the party(awkward, but yeah it happened omg), and made out on the floor, he was a genuinely good guy. I think he expected something at the end of the...

May 19th

1 note

1 tag

May 19th

4 notes

2 tags

i made out with a boy last night. what.

May 19th

3 notes

1 tag

May 18th

1 note

1 tag

May 18th

3 tags

May 18th

1 note

in my head: constructs witty and insightful answers to interview questions for when I'm famous

ordering at a restaurant: please i the soup want

May 18th

158,717 notes

May 18th

13,081 notes

bedquest: I AM GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH WITH MY OWn mouth softly because i like you

May 18th

257,341 notes

May 18th

20,495 notes

May 18th

108,832 notes

1 tag

May 18th

1 note

1 tag

May 17th

2 tags

May 17th

2 notes

4 tags

I want to sleep for another like 5 hourssss but instead I must drive 5 hours weeeeeeeeEEEEEeeee

May 17th

1 tag

Too much gossip at one table

May 17th

I just really want to cuddle wah.

May 17th

1 note

I AM SO PISSED GOD DAMN.

May 16th

4 tags

JUST FINISHED SEASONgr8 of SPN AND WTF. WTF. WTF. WTF. I HATE THESE WRITERS WTF.

May 16th

2 notes

javert: let the old man keep on running
javert: i will run him off his
javert: feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet
javert: everyoneaboutyourbusinessclearthisgarbageoffthestreet

May 16th

4,832 notes

May 16th

63,953 notes

1 tag

May 16th

118,086 notes

therealhorusszahhak: This guy at my school shows up every day with like a fake wolf tail clipped to his back belt loop, and I always see him running from class to class and jumping over things and he looks so happy to exist and sometimes he brings a lil wolf puppet with him and he makes it run along next to him on the strings I’m just like u go wolf kid live ur dreams

May 16th

95,751 notes